'Bred Crumbs
03.09.05
Photo-synthesis
10:33 PMWarmth!
Warmth warmth warmth warmth! And sun! With a likelihood of it all lingering a few days.
There is much written and discussed about seasonal affective disorder, of which I'm sure I have a minor case. But you never hear about the upside – how easy it is to feel good when the cold and clouds have receded. People notice in it me. There's a bounce. The flimsy troubles I constantly craft for myself crumple and blow away. The world seems OK – or at least, its rampant non-OK-ness doesn't leap immediately to mind.
And that was all before one of the women at our friendly neighborhood Thai place told me I look good in shorts.
For once, I didn't deflect the compliment, externally or internally. I accepted it, chose to believe it.
It's a springtime miracle.
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Meanwhile, in the wintry East, at a place called Newsweek, the hands, they are a-wringin'. Seems last week, they thought it would be clever to put a phony photo of Martha Stewart on the cover. Even putting aside the hundreds of things that are maddening and wrong about Martha-mania, it was a patently bad idea, as was realized too late.
But the editors and publishers have huddled remorsefully, and made the bold decision ... to never again put doctored photos on the cover of their magazine? Oh, no. They've analyzed and finger-pointed and decided the real problem is: the credits for cover artwork aren't on the cover. Well, no more! Next time they want to make up a news photo, right there on the cover will be, in tiny print, the words "photo illustration." And that will explain everything.
The newspaper, and apparently the magazine, world is full of secret little terms like "photo illustration" that are vested with much meaning and almost certainly have none to readers. A great example is "Special to [Publication Name]" at the top of an article. Every newspaper uses it, but it doesn't always mean the same thing. Sometimes, it means the writer of the article is a mere freelancer, not a holy staff writer. More often, it means what follows is a press release, maybe rewritten or edited, maybe not. Whatever it is, it probably isn't special in any way.
So next time you pick up Newsweek, and it says "photo illustration" on the cover, you'll know what that really means. It means, "we think we're The Daily Show."
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