'Bred Crumbs
02.24.05
States of Excitement
09:52 PMA woman on BART was reading a book with a chuckle-inducing title:
WISCONSIN!
Subsequent research shows that Wisconsin! is part of a series by one Dana Fuller Harris (not his real name) called Wagons West. The series comprises* 24 novels.
It all began with Independence!, a source of understandable exclamation. But next was Nebraska! – already, the excitement seems more than a little forced. On the saga roamed, through Utah! and Mississippi!, which is kind of pushing the "West" bit. Wisconsin! clocks in at Book 19, followed immediately by Kentucky!, which I can personally assure you: nuh-uh. Finally, the series ends, which is cause for Celebration!
Not to say the books are bad; I have no idea, and probably never will, having little interest in Westerns. The woman on BART wasn't making any faces while she read, and – well, holy crap, she's on Book 19! It's possible she's reading it stand-alone, but let's imagine she's not. It's more impressive.
Later, the author would revisit the sprawling family at the heart of these novels, the Holts, in another series, this one a mere trilogy: Westward!, Expedition! and Outpost! Yet, there's something more potential alarming in this massive oeuvre** than all those exclamation points: the hero of the first several Wagons West books is named Whip Holt. And, says a description that must come from a publisher's blurb, he's "never been bested by man or beast."
"Whip Holt"? "Never been bested by man"? Now that's the kind of talk that'll give you an exclamation point.
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* Not "is comprised of." Ninety-nine percent of newspaper writers and editors would flunk this usage test.
** A word from France!
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